Sunday, July 31, 2011

Affirmation? Yes please, may I have another?

Hello Friends!

The subject on my mind these last few weeks has been affirmation. If you aren't well aquinted with being affirmed...join the club. While affirming others and ourselves is very important in life, having affirmation from your spouse is REALLY, REALLY important. Before anybody gets their panties in a wad, I discussed this with my hubbster, this blog is paid for and approved by him.  I am not disclosing any personal information that he doesn't know about.  That being said, redecorating a house is well...NOT like it is on the Home Depot commercial. We were not laughing and splattering paint on one anothers face ending it with a kiss. In fact, quite the opposite. We fought like cats and dogs, through out this entire process. We may continue to fight, not sayin the fat lady sung yet. But.....the most important thing is that, since the white horse went buck wild and left our lives (you know, the one Steven used to ride), we are down to the nitty gritty of what marriage is really all about. YES REALLY! Dude, people divorce over stuff like this. Maybe not over this one situation, but after years of non-compliant husbands, um I mean spouses, they leave. So my journey with this has been animated (I know you don't believe that, me? animated?), and let's just say lively. Now that I am rounding the corner and can see the light, I pondered what is the most important thing that I feel like I need. Yes, a cold coke and a baby did make the top of the list, but running a close second was AFFIRMATION. Please people, how do you think your spouse would react if you woke up tomorrow morning and said "thank you so much for working hard to support our family. I know we don't have everything and times are tough but knowing that you would walk on hot coals to feed us is enough for me".  Awkward. I hear the "but you don't understand how freakin annoying my husband is... uh yeah I assure you...I do! lol . Doesnt change a thing and I'll be more than happy to tell you why. Check out this awesome info I found on reasons affirmation is so necessary in a marriage. (For you single people, the fast you learn this, the better off you will be. And it applies in all aspects of life. =))

This is important for at least four reasons:

  1.  You get more of what you affirm. Have you ever noticed that when someone praises you, you want to repeat the behavior that caused it? This is just human nature. It can be a form of manipulation if it isn’t genuine. But it can be a powerful way to motivate others when it is authentic. (I take no responsibility for you manipulating your husband for anything, although I may be just a tad guilty of that me-own-self!) If you have never done the love language test you should. It's awesome. Go to and check it out).
  1. Affirmation shifts your attitude toward your spouse. Words are powerful tools. They can create, or they can destroy. The Bible says that our tongues are sharper than any two-edged sword. WOW>They can build up, or they can tear down. I believe most people have a drive to align their actions—and their attitudes—with their words. If you start speaking well of someone, you start believing what you say. Next thing you know, you may just like your spouse!
  2. Affirmation helps strengthen your spouse’s best qualities. Encouragement is also a powerful force for good. All of us need positive reinforcement. This is why when we are losing weight and people notice, it gives us the strength to stick with the program. This is true in every area of life. This is very important for people like me that tend to be negative about EVERYTHING!
  3. Affirmation wards off the temptation of adultery. When others see you are happily married, they are less likely to proposition you. It’s like a hedge that protects your marriage from would-be predators. You simply stop being a target. I'm gonna leave this alone now. Nuff said.
  4. Affirmation provides a model to those you lead. To be a truly effective leader, you must lead yourself, and then you must lead your family. Your marriage is a powerful visual of how you treat the people you value the most. When you speak highly of your spouse, your followers are more likely to trust you. It takes your leadership to another level. Hayyyyyyyy. Shape up, or ship it out.

Affirming your spouse in public is an investment that pays big leadership dividends. In a world where fewer and fewer marriages last, it can be a difference-maker in yours and mine. Steven says "we have no plan b. plan b is you in the woods and me with a shovel". Instead of ending up there, maybe I should try the old affirmation thing. Maybe you should too. Let me know how it works out for ya! 

Just FYI: Here are my results. Omg. Imagine this.

Test Results:

Percent Language Score
Words of Affirmation   10  
Quality Time     8
Receiving Gifts   5  

Acts of Service   9  
Physical Touch    
How to Interpret Your Profile Score

Your highest score indicates your primary love language. Your second highest score indicates your secondary love language. If two scores are identical, you are bi-lingual(you have two Primary love languages). If the scores of your primary language and your secondary language are close(for example, 10 and 9 respectively), it indicates both are important to you. The highest possible score for any one love language is 12.

Having a clear picture of your primary and secondary love languages will explain much of your past behavior. Think back over the past and ask yourself, "What have I most often requested of my spouse?" Chances are your answer will lie within the scope of your primary and secondary love languages. You have been requesting that which would meet your deepest need for emotional love. Your requests, however, might have come across as nagging or criticizing and thus drove your spouse away.


Thursday, July 28, 2011

All Things Thrifty Home Accessories and Decor: Everything I know about Spray Paint!

All Things Thrifty Home Accessories and Decor: Everything I know about Spray Paint!: "I get quite a few questions about spray paint, and I thought the most useful way for all of my readers would be to answer those questions pu..."

All Things Thrifty Home Accessories and Decor: All Things Thrifty has been Featured!

All Things Thrifty Home Accessories and Decor: All Things Thrifty has been Featured!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Infertility=can of krylon. I'll spray paint you if you stand still long enough!

For those of you that don't know me and are just being nosy or lurking on me, there are a few things I must say before I get into this whole blogging thing. First, I cannot spell. If you are having a heart attack, need a catheter, are bleeding from your rectum or any other orifice...I am your girl! Spelling...NOT SO MUCH!  If you are going to follow this blog you will have to forgive my poor spelling, and "southern" grammar. I write just like I speak! So consider the context and forgive my lack of writing ability! Second, I am very ADD. You also must overlook the fact that I will probably skip back and forth and forget what I was even talking about by the end of the paragraph. So that being said I'll try to keep up! Enjoy the novel that is my life!

So I originally sat down and wrote this blog about 3 months ago. I went to press "post" when I heard something (something being that still, small voice in your mind that tells you..."yo, that's probably not a good idea. Yeah, that one. The one I have ignored for many years) tell me not to do it. I had no idea why, I just put the computer down and went to bed. (The voice could have been the Ambien talking but that's beside the point). Anyway, I never thought another thing about it. The original intent (that one's for you dad), was to explain my infertility woes as they unfolded. That sounds very narcissistic (yeah, no spell check), but I truly have had many people text me and call me concerning what is going on in my life, and I just don't have enough time to properly fill everybody in. I do not think that facebook is the proper place to plaster infertility issues, so I thought Hey, I'll write a blog. Long story short, fast forward 3 months. I was working in the garage on one of my many craft projects when as sure as I am standing here, there was the voice again. For those of you that believe in God, it was totally Him talking to me. If that freaks you out, you might want to close this tab and go back to lurking on facebook (hahaha cracking myself up). Anyways, I heard the voice which will from here on out be referred to as God, speak to me and I bet you want to know what he said! He said (LOUD BOOMING VOICE) YOUR GETTING ON MY NERVES. No really he didn't say that, He told me that I should go and write the blog now. Of course I began to argue, in true Jessica fashion. But why now? But why not then? But I'm busy. But, but, but. So He told me that I should write it now because my heart has changed. He said, you started to write this blog to evoke sympathy (omg really? did he have to smack me with that?), but that is totally not the point. Now you can go and write the blog as a testament to my faithfulness to you. Instead of making this about you, why don't you try making it about me! REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY? REALLLLLY? Ouchhhhhhhh. I almost drove a nail through my finger. I think I even said out loud "really"? Dang God, that hurt. (See me and God, we are cool like that. I am sarcastic to Him, and He is ridiculously sarcastic right back to me- I met my match).  No really though, as much as it hurts to hear it, He was right. As hard as infertility has been (and thats a whole nuther story for l8r), God has been so good to me. I have learned more and grown more in the past year than I have in about the last 10 combined. He continues to comfort me, reassure me, teach me, scream at me (necessary dude), and mostly love on me like I never imagined possible. I have no idea where I am going with this other than to say that I am happier and more content and just as infertile now, as I was a year ago. Do I have my moments? Absolutely. I don't think I'll ever stop having them (although the Lexapro helps the voices! lolol). Seriously, I can sum this up with a little story you may have heard of. It's about a gentleman named Abraham. He just happens to be my forefather, and I therefore am destined to receive his inheretance!! Read on and let this give you hope. It's not just about having a baby, it's about how incredible our heavenly father is, and how much He cares about the things that we think are insignificant. 

Sarah is married to Abraham. She is unable to conceive, although married for many years. Eventually she is not only unable to conceive but beyond childbearing years. (ie she is old as well...)
Ironically she is married to Abraham who has been promised descendants that will number like the stars in the sky and the sand on a beach. A great promise and yet for Abraham and Sarah, the fulfilment seems beyond all reach. (and I thought my situation was bad? at least i'm still pre-menapausal)
It is at this point that The Lord comes to Abraham once more.

"Then the LORD said, I will surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your wife will have a son
. Now Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent, which was behind him.
11 Abraham and Sarah were already old and well advanced in years, and Sarah was past the age of childbearing.
12 So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought,
After I am worn out and my master is old, will I now have this pleasure? (can't help but laugh here. That sounds just like me!)
13 Then the LORD said to Abraham, Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Will I really have a child, now that I am old?'

Is anything too hard for the LORD? I will return to you at the appointed time next year and Sarah will have a son.

And the result??? Not long after this Sarah and Abraham's son Isaac is born, one of the great patriarchs of the Jewish people.

"For nothing is impossible with God" (Luke 1:37)
Wow!!!!!! Be encouraged. The God of Abraham is the same God that is in my heart right this very second!!! He is everything I need and then some!
So back to babies...I'll let everybody in the known free world know when my time comes, (and for the record, it's soon), but until then, if I never have a baby it will not sway my belief in my loving, concerned father one stitch.  I have no idea what happened to me, but I'm pretty sure it's my moms fault. After all, she didn't breast feed me =( . 
I'll be in touch and I'll post some craft stuff tomorrow for those of you asking.